Monday 2 January 2017

Dark monster

Time of day? I do not know.
How long have I slept? Or did I at all?
I need to get up but my chest feels weighted, empty, about to erupt
Waking means panicking; reaching a climax unable to breathe, unable to stop!
If it is a good day, I get out of bed
I eat nothing and neither do I bathe.
Instead I pretend,
I pretend I exist,
I act like I function,
I move and I stir.
My thoughts are a blur, can't distinguish what's true
above all they torture me, my Furies at play!
I hide the truth, the pain that is beneath
retreat into loneliness that seems befit.
I crawl back into bed, give in to the dark
hoping if I close my eyes, all will depart.

And then I open my eyes...
Time of day? I do not know...